at the crack of dawn

~ This week's been pretty random .. *THANK GOD!* .. kinda need tat break outta my way-too-static life motions .... like now, i am supposed to be in bed .. but then i wouldnt wanna miss out on my first friday nite in december .. wakakkakakkaa ... eniwei, speaking of early december, this weekend happens to be a very sad time, if not otherwise, for my close buddy Pooch who is leaving Canada for good to head back to Singapore ... yeah, tat's rite .. everybody's going Singapore .. sooner or later, we'll all be Mr. & Mrs. Kiasu .. wakakakkakakka .. i feel very happy for him tat things have finally settled down in the nick of time .. i'm sure he is too .. isn't tat rite bro? wakakakkakaa .. well, the good news is tat u still have less than 72 hours to knock urself out .. i wish i could be there to knock u out myself ... but i can't ... sob sob sob .. but i am sure u'll have a blast with the gank .. wooohoooooo .. ~

~ i've been thinking alot lately .. about stuff ... especially my work .. i've been working for almost 6 months already ... n i feel like i know alot better than when i first started out fresh .. i mean it was like "Dude, what the heck am i supposed to do here? Click this .. and then what?" ... but hey, there's always a first time for everything in life .. and so as this one ... eniwei, i am actually kinda happy with the job ... especially when i am in the mood for some serious damages .. wakakaka .. it just gives me tat i-want-more kinda feeling .. n it somehow resurrects myself from the dead, if u will ... LOL .. it makes me feel somehow content when i know what the hell i am doing ... i can still remember how i wished tat i'd never finished a project so tat i wouldnt be assigned a new one .. wakakakkaka .. the frustration tends to pile up and makes u do stupid things like this .. but now, the current kinda drifts in the other direction ... in fact, i beg for new projects as soon as i finished one ... simply bcoz i hate opening up old projects to fix bugs and some other crap .. however, i wouldnt say i want to stick to this job in the long term tho .. i guess it's more like a stepping stone .. u know, something temporary ... neway, enuf about the job itself .. what gets me really ticked off at times is the company tat i work for ... i dun even know whether it deserves to be a company in the first place when there are only 2 friggin' people working full time .. sighs .. n i wouldnt consider myself a full time either .. at least from my point of view .. first of all, i was never given a key to the front door up to this very second i'm writing this up .. they said tat i will be handed a key after i completed my probation time, which ended 2 months ago ... as a result, i am asked to skip work whenever my friend/manager wont be able to make it the next day .. like wat happened last friday .. plus i am only paid for the hours tat i put in .. no work = no pay .... even though it wasnt my fault, if i may put it this way ... in addition, i would have to stand outside the office if he arrived later than me, which is usually the case btw .. imagine waiting in this winter weather .. i mean, the person who holds the key should be the first person arriving at the office .. tat's just common sense .. *yeah rite, like i can stuff this into his brain* ... sighs .. but luckily, he's been turning up earlier than usual ... so it's good ... phew .. Next is the smoking problem .. man, i wish i could take tat cigarette n shove it up his ass .. ARGHHH!!! ... to be honest, i am pretty sensitive to smoke ... and i managed to confront him about his inconsiderate habit last month or so .. i sincerely told him to take his smoke outside the office .. n he agreed to tat .. i mean it's not like he doesnt know tat i dont smoke .. GOD! some people are just unbelievable ... when things are beginning to turn in my favor, it doesnt usually last long .. at least in my case .. since it began to snow around here, he's been taking his "break" back into the office .. and now, there are TWO people ... apparently he's been taking his galfriend to the office for i dont know watever reason ... i am not even sure if she's supposed to be there since she's not even working there .. i mean, can u keep this professional?!? .... sighs ... would u like it if i bring my galfriend in? i dun think so ..... so there u go ... crap ... wat should i do now? bring this up to the company owner? .. too bad the chances are tat he wouldnt even give it a damn .... simply bcoz he doesnt like me ... u can count on this .. n i am not making this up .. i dun need to explain ... but u know when someone doesnt like u around .. but i always try to be nice to him anyway .. coz i need this job ... as simple as tat .. n everything comes down to tat .. i could be yapping about all the complaints for all i care .. n it still wouldnt make a f***ing difference ... so just have to swallow it hard ... sighs ... after all, i am still laughing here .. wakakakakkakakka ... despite the things i talked about, i am still hoping for the best to come yet .. as always .. never lose hope .. ^^ .. hihihi .. alritey then .. u peeps have a good one yach .. btw, i havent received my pay-cheque yet and wont be getting one til about end of next week .. it's always like this ... late payments .. sighs .. me out now ~ cheers

"I don't fear death .. for death is only a state of transition .. but living without hope .. now, that's what i call a living hell"